Meeting “half way”

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Level 1
Not sure if this is the correct area to post but this just happened to me and i thought I’d share. Hopefully this helps people from getting tricked and to think first before agreeing to “meet halfway” to do a sale.

I listed my item for sale on offer up. The buyer messaged me and asked if i could lower the price. My response to him was that i thought it was a fair price.

He then asks if i could “meet him half way” from his house to do the sale. I asked where that would be. He tells me a city that he thinks is about half way between the both of us. At first i was surprised because offer up posts the location right under your username and I’m familiar with the area.

I took a look at his posted items and confirmed that he was IN the city that he was telling me was “half way”. I told him I didn’t wanna drive out that far but i didn’t tell him that i thought he was lying to me. He basically wanted me to deliver the item to him.

(I know you can change the location of an item when posting but with all his listings being in that city, i highly doubt that wasn’t where he lived.)
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7 REPLIES 7
I always put "Must pick up in [city]" in all of my ads. If they still request to meet somewhere else then they are likely not a real buyer so I block them.

I hate when someone says, "I'm in ____ city can you meet somewhere closer to me?" People are so **bleep** selfish. I usually reply with, "I don't care if you're in Hawaii, Florida, or Antarctica, 'Must pick up in _____' means you must pick up in _____. Period."
Community Helper
I'm the same way as @MyStuffisGreat although I say must be in x area in the description. I still have people an hour away messaging me about stuff. I always ask them if they can come to x area. If they say yes, we set up a meetup. If they are hesitant, we go back and forth. Sometimes they dont answer me after I ask that.
Level 9
I just say I don't have a car if they ask to meet halfway, which is true.

They will usually reply with "okay", stop messaging or come back to buy later on.

As a buyer, if it's something that I really want and is a couple minutes away I usually tell them I will pay for gas if they meet me in my city.

Most are cool with that.

I've found that it pays off to just be polite, even when they are being ridiculous and a block is warranted. You did good OP

If they are persistently spamming my inbox, decide to curse at me or are pushy, that's when I block them.
@goblin I disagree. There are too many flakes to warrant being polite to them. Plus, being polite doesnt teach them anything when they're being selfish or disrespectful and not reading the ad. Instead, it enables them to continue doing it to the next person. At least in my case because I always say "Must pick up."

Too many bad apples have ruined it for me in my 10 years of reselling, so even if I was offered extra money to travel to you (if not in my neighborhood) I wouldn't do it. There is no guarantee you will buy the item when we meet, let alone a guarantee you'll even show up. So I could drive all the way there, wait for 20+minutes, you not show, i get no sale, no money, no gas money, time wasted, feeling frustrated and foolish, get pulled over by cop or get into car accident, etc. Just not worth it. My only exceptions are for high priced items and items I haven't been able to sell in a long time.

The percentage of flakes is high; and trust me when I say a good percentage of those flakes are those with MANY 5-star reviews here on OfferUp. I have had more problems with 5-star highly rated users than any other, but the rating system is a whole other rabbit hole i wont get into.
Level 9
We're just very diffrent people I guess.

It think it's about approaching the situation a certain way.

In my opinion I don't think you're going to condition people to respond a certain way if you basically tell them.

'Read the ad you stupid m----f-----'

You've not only lost a potential sale, but have made an enemy.

Maybe an unstable one, who feels so disrespected he will make a new account find you and fight you if we're talking about what if's.

I would just keep something like this on clipboard.

'No sorry, as the Ad states, I only meet in my city, too many people keep flaking'

A diffrent approach and you achieve the result you want.

Fear of flakes.

Back in the day if my bus was heading a certain direction I would carry the item with me if the buyer put something on the line.

I would ask for a non refundable deposit like Amazon Gift $1-3 to make sure that the buyer was serious.

OfferUp may frown upon this, but if you're an honest person you won't just keep the money and instead follow through.

In my experience, you have a 50 / 50 chance of them agreeing to it.

It works trust me, people freak out when they have invested money no matter how small.
Level 5

i consistently say that i would LOVE to know where the poster of a forum message is posting from/about.  this post is amazing to me and where are all of you (the poster and the responders) that say you have had this same issue??  whaaaaaaat?!?  this is nuts. meet me in a different city???  that reeks of "...and she was never heard from again..." 

this is new to me and i am in las vegas where NOTHING is unheard of.  

I just say "Read the ad." If they get offended at their laziness and my directness, oh well. Most legit buyers know to read the ad. And if you forgot the info or whatever, instead of being a sensitive uptight sally who is so insecure at being called out for being in the wrong that you want to make a fake account to harass me, just own it and simply say "oh sorry I didnt see it." The end. (And that sensitive sally is also why I rarely meet at my home)